Coercion to circumcise


In 1942 in New Zealand, a woman gave birth to a son (placenta praevia, c-section). A day or so later, the Matron came in.
Matron: Do you want him circumcised?
Mother: Oh, I don't know. I'd better ask my husband.
Father: I don't know about that. There might be some valuable nerves down there.
Mother: No, thank you.
Matron (becoming agitated): It'll swell up to the size of a lemon! He'll be brought in screaming, to have it done!
Mother (to herself): What [utter nonsense]! (to Matron) No.
Acquaintance: He might have to fight in the desert. He'll get sand under it and it'll get infected and he'll have to have it done.
Mother (a pacifist, to herself): Damned if I'm going to have him cut to turn him into cannon-fodder ...


First-person accounts of babies and children cut
without even parental consent


While I was asleep


Rebecca Edwards on Facebook, December 19, 2010

My ... son was taken by the hospital while I was asleep the morning after his birth [13 years ago] and circumcised without my permission. I was very upset but I was young and never followed thru with a lawsuit. They even did the circumcision wrong and it was crooked. I won't name the hospital but it is the biggest teaching hospital in Dallas. Whatever you decide, it should be your decision to make.


"a short [d]evalutation"

Mellissa on Peaceful Parenting February 22, 2010

I have 2 sons. My first boy was born when I was 18 years old in Texas. I never knew that was a choice and so when the doctor came in and whisked him away I didn't bat an eye. When they returned him to me when a swollen and oozing penis, still lightly sobbing, I knew something terrible had been done. ... When my next son ... was born three years later we refused to sign the consent form that was bundled in with my intake papers. Shortly after my sweet son was born he was picked up for "shots and a short evaluation" and returned to me an hour and a half later with a circumsized penis. (Legal matters were taken, but what what good do they do my son?)


One way to make it "customary" ...

Christy Lindsey on One Day at a Time May 31, 2010

My mother in law told me that when she had her boys, the hospital just automatically circumcised them and didn't even ask the parents!

[A regretful mother could be excused for downplaying her role in retrospect. First-hand accounts of this would be welcome.]


James Peron on YouTube June 1, 2010 (24" in)

When our twin sons were born, 47 years ago, I told the doctor at that time that I did not want them circumcised. He went into hospital next morning and deliberately circumcised them.


Ferdinand Bardamu on In Mala Fide June 8, 2010

I'm among the many men in America who were cut at a young age. Specifically, according to my mom, I was circumcised the day after I was born. From what I recall her telling me (this was a long time ago), it was apparently against her will - the surgeons snuck in to do the dirty deed while she was in the bathroom or something and no one else was around to stop them.


Ellen on Skeptical OB October7, 2010

...I have definitely heard men complain about this, including my own father. He was adamant that my brother would not be circumcised, and then the doctor did it anyway even though he had explicitly been told not to. My dad was PISSED.


Guest on Skeptical OB October7, 2010

Ellen, I was talking to a friend of mine, who was raised by a 100% hardcore 1960s hippy. She mentioned that her brother was circumcised and I told her I was very surprised by that. She told me that her mother was coerced into it - they had her sign the permission form and told her it was for something else. ...


blessedquiver on cafemom, October 10, 2010

I have 5 sons...4 which are intact. My first son was born when I was a very young woman and so shy I was scared to ask questions. I heard my son crying in the nursery, pushed the nurse call button, and waited. When the nurse came she had a permission slip for me to sign. I asked her to please bring me my son. She refused until I signed the piece of paper giving them permission to circ him. I was still debating if I could go through with it. I asked again for my son, and she said that it would be a few because they had already circed him!!!! Without my permission. Crying, I signed the permission slip. When they brought him to me, he was lethargic from screaming for 30 minutes, wouldn't nurse for several hours because they had given him a bottle of sugar water and was damaged. Not only had they not asked permission first, they had botched the job. The tip of his penis has a scar from where too much skin was removed. He is now 21, almost 22. He shyly told me when he was younger that when he gets an erection that it is painful, because the skin pulls so badly. I can honestly say that the woman I am today would have kicked some booty for what was done to my son. My heart was broken, and I was horrified at how they could have taken that decision from me.


... [my son's] Step Dad is a regretful product of a maltreated mother and a trickery of a circumcision-- they assumed she wanted, that caused my poor Mother in law to run screaming and crying down the hospital corridor with my future husband bleeding and mutilated! ...

Nan Jorgenen on Salon.com, October 19, 2010


kyleisreallycool on YouTube, November, 2010

I wish i still had my skin. ****ing doctor didn't even ask my parents. he just chopped it right off.


simone on Mark's Daily Apple, January 2, 2011

My mother said she regretted having my brothers cut, and if she could do it again, she would leave them intact. She said that it was done automatically … she didn’t even realize she had a choice. She became a nurse later in life, and came home from the hospital on more than one occasion in tears after witnessing a botched circ…once absolutely beside herself because she didn’t see any way the baby would grow up to live a normal life.


a new father told me he told me he wasn't given an option for circ. he was shocked how much blood and care was required, post op

jglti on Twiiter, March 10, 2010


Lauren Ross describes a case where a non-English-speaking mother signed a circumcision consent form under the impression it was a discharge form, and sued.

Youtube, February 25, 2011 (58:30 in)


bothandeach on Live Science April 30, 2011

I was circumsised as a boy of 12 without my parents consent in an Albert[a] hospital, far from home. It was horribly painful and I doubt all benefits. NO, I say.


TomSil on the Huffington Post May 17, 2011

... When I was young, there were no computers or anti-circu­mcision groups. Circumcisi­on was just accepted as part of being male. My mother told me that they just came in one day at the hospital, picked me up, and told her that I was scheduled to have my circumcisi­on. No questions asked and no signatures required! But, that was over sixty years ago. ...

Fought and lost

Jennifer Hoffman on Huffington Post May 19, 2011

Those of you who think this is option or a 'private family matter' as the author writes have not had children and fought with the hospital and physician over whether your son should be circumcise­d. I fought it with both of my sons and lost because the doctor insisted and actually did it without my approval. I wondered, since I am neither Jewish nor Muslim (I am from France, a country which does not practice routine circumcisi­on) why my sons had to go through this procedure. ...

This was nearly 30 years ago and although I specifical­ly said that I did not want it done, it was done anyway.


Sarah on FrontPageMagJuly 26, 2011

... My husband was born in Cincinnati in 1964. He was circumcised with all the other males in the nursery without the consent or knowledge of his parents. Had they been asked, his parents would have said no. His father was intact and their family is Cherokee and had no cultural history of circumcision.


Gaytorguy on the Bilerico Project, August 23, 2011

I was born in 1955. My grandparents came from Europe. My father's side were Roman Catholics. My mother's side Russian Orthodox. ...

My father was not circumcised, he was the youngest of his family. My younger maternal uncle was also not circumcised. This knowledge gained from showering together when I was a small boy after going to the beach.

That was when I noticed the difference between me and them. After pondering it for a while and trying to get my "foreskin"to be like theirs I asked my parents why I looked different. I was informed I was circumcised. And I found out my parents had no say one way or the other about it. The first time my mother bathed me she noticed it and asked why I was circumcised. Apparently, it was standard ... procedure to perform this on male babies. No opt out options. No discussion about it or even a passing mention of it. ... So, I was operated on without my approval nor the approval of my parents.

... except for one White boy and all the Black and Latino and Asian boys in my P.E. classes, all the other white boys were circumcised. Seems like it was a pandemic for White boys. Most of the Black, Asian and Latinos were born in the same hospital I was. They were not cut, but the White boys were. Talk about another impact of segregation.


BJ-3577476 on MSNBCSeptember 3, 2011

... not everyone has the choice. When my sons were born they didn't give me a choice or any information on it. Where I live it's common practice to just do it without having to have parental consent.


The parents sued and lost

fathero on StarPress.com, Delaware, September 19, 2011

me and my wife were in the delivery room and she was already sedadide and the nurse camed in with a clipboard to my wife and said if you don't want your child circumcised then put a big X across this page, she did. well my son was born without problems once again thank God. Then the next morning we found out about the circumcising and were devestated.


The emotional scar lasted a lifetime

Gregory Tutko, FL on the Petition Site November 1, 2011

... I watched my aunt go through post-partum depression after the birth of her son circumcised without her informed consent. The emotional scar lasted a lifetime, as did the scar on my cousins penis.


Laurie A Couture on Facebook January 26, 2012

My poor baby had this barbaric amputation done to him by his teen birthmother, who was not informed by the nurses or doctors that she had any other option.


"Reason to operate? Live birth"

gdcat777 on YouTube June 11, 2012

... My father was intact, and was away at the time, and my drugged mother doesn't remember signing the form. Under "reason to operate"? was the indication "live birth," and that's not a disease. It was basically illegal.


buddapeacecz on the Huffington Post, July 23, 2012

My mom said they didn't even ask her with my older brothers, the Catholic hospital just did it...no consent nothing....(late 1940's)


Baby_Raptor Sue Blue on Patheos, April 2013

My son was barely 12 hours old when they circumcised him...And they did it despite my saying I didn't want it done. His father did, and his was the only opinion that mattered, apparently.


E.A. on OMG - Yahoo.ca, April 11, 2013

My brother who was born in 79' was circumcised by the doctor without my mother first being asked what she wanted. She would have said no.


Danielle Cruzen on Facebook, August 1, 2013

My mom ... told me how when she'd had my brother when she was 17 (this was 1971 and in Michigan ) how circumcision wasn't even presented to her as a choice. She felt intimidated by the doctors.

She said that when she heard his screams, her instinct screamed at her to go help him and she started crying. She instantly understood why I was against it now, and said "I've always felt in my gut that it made no sense".

What bullies doctors can be.

... I'm glad to share her story! She would approve.


Courteney Elizabeth Pepper on Facebook, August 25, 2013

They let my grandmother sign the consent form for my son to be circumcised and then took him while I was sleeping without telling me. They woke me up when they brought him back and told me how to care for it. They didn't tell me anything about the surgery beforehand other than telling me "it's necessary, every boy gets it sooner or later." And then they told me he'd have a much higher chance of dying if it was an emergency.


Robert S on Yahoo! August 28, 2013

... I asked my dad about it and he said that no one asked him, they just did it. I guess that they could have done it to me without asking and charged my parents for it, back then no one questioned the actions of a doctor.


Richard Dawkins in An Appetite for Wonder: The Making of a Scientist (HarperCollins), 2013 p36

"Dr. Trim was fortuitously well named, for he was presumably the one responsible for having me circumcised. Obviously, I wasn´t asked for my consent, but it seems my parents weren´t either! My father, away at the war, knew nothing of it. My mother was simply informed as a matter of routine by a nurse that it was time for me to go for my circumcision, and that was that. Apparently it was the default presumption in Dr. Trim´s nursing home -as it may have been in many British hospitals of the time...


Tyler Marie Jenkins on Facebook November 26, 2013

My sons are happy and healthy circumcised boys too. That doesn't mean it was my right to make that decision for them. If a single doctor had ever once told me it was not necessary, i never would have done it. Instead, they told me i had no choice, and that it wasn't optional.


Jenny Thornby on Facebook, June 29, 2014

... So many years ago, it was just done. I well knew a woman of my mothers age, who had no idea her sons had been circumcised. She was in hospital until after the dressing was removed - more than 14 days. Thought her sons were intact.


Max Roberts on Facebook, June 29, 2014

... When I was circumcised 56 years ago, the doctor who delivered me poked his head around the door of my mother's ward and said "I'm here to do your boy now." My mother had no idea of what he was talking about. She didn't realise that he was mutilating my penis until after it was all done and I was brought to her. I hate being circumcised and so much wish I had my foreskin and that is why I fight this fight, so baby boys now won't suffer this emotional pain in the future.


Paul Dean Wall on Dr John Trainer's Facebook page December 5, 2014

... born, 'pre-consent' (1959,)my mother's choice to leave me intact was ignored by her doctor...who knew better than some hick lady that hadn't been to medical school!

coerce Paul Wall ''ignored my mother's defiant ''No circ!'' ''

- The Men's Rights Initiative on Facebook, September 1, 2018

Samantha Gray on Mom.me, October 1, 2015

If i ever have a boy, I will not have him circumcised after what I've seen my 6 year old step son go through! When he was born the doctors didn't ask neither of his parents about him being circumcised, they just went ahead and done it. The first time they didn't do it right and he just recently had to be recircumcised at the age of 5 after dealing with a lot of pain from them not doing it right in the first place. So I'm not going to put my future child at risk of this happening to him if I ever have a boy.

4 examples of babies cut without parental consent

- on Joe.My.God. February 8, 2016

coerce-grant-w ''I was...mutilated for no good reason''

- on Michael Dulin's Facebook page, March 27, 2016


coerce-'cut without consent''

("To each their own" is exactly what Intactivists say:
To each person, their own choice
about how much of their own
genitals they get to keep.)
Five stories of husbands or brothers cut without parental consent were shared on Your Whole Baby on Facebook, April 22, 2017.

coerce-marion ''I wasn't even asked to consent it was just done automatically''

- comment on "Is Male Circumcision Child Abuse?"
by Sean Braswell, Ozy, May 22, 2017

- on Rosemary Romberg's Facebook page, June 19, 2018
coerce ''when I was asleep''
- Twitter, September 2, 2018
coerce-ashley ''I was drugged up from birth''
- Facebook, June 21, 2019
coerce-sparky ''doctor ... didn't even ask''

coerce-jewelz ''the nurse swept my son away''
- Twitter, November 19, 2021
coerce-lady-anne-"they messed up and did it anyway"
- Twitter, December 27, 2021
coerce-kelli ''the doctor took him away''

(55 without consent)


...and narrow escapes

Carol Wright on Facebook September 30, 2012

When I was in the hospital following my son's birth in Jackson, TN (Jackson-Madison county General Hospital) they FORCED me to allow them to remove my son from my room every night so they could bathe and examine my son. I was tempted to balk and say Absolutely not but I had lost a lot of blood and was still pretty weak.

I had a birth plan that stated "No-circ" I also had written in several places on his paperwork that he was not to be circed. did not give consent or anything.

One night the nursery called me to inform me that my son would be circumcised that night. I flew off of the handle. I said No. I didn't sign consent for that. The nurse says "Well, we'll do it anyway and you can sign consent later." OH HELL NO. I SCREAMED Into the phone that whoever cut my son would be answering to me. I informed them I was coming to get MY baby. I was halfway down the hall to the nursery when my nurse came to "encourage me" to go back to bed. I said no and walked to the nursery and waited for them to bring me my son. The pediatrician that had been caring for him in the hospital told me there was no way she would have cut him against my wishes but i remain unconvinced. I was LIVID. you just DO NOT tell a woman you are going to lop off a piece of her precious baby's body and expect her to take it in stride. I will not ever allow any of my babies out of my sight in the hospital again. It was too close of a call. My son is still whole, no thanks to the hospital.


spaceycasey on September 21, 2011

It was in Spartanburg, SC @ Spartanburg Regional. I had told his pediatrician and 2 different nurses that we didn't want him cut. They took him for whatever bloodwork they do (?) and didn't bring him back. I called 3 x's that I wanted my son back in the room w/ me and they said "ok, soon" but 2 hours went by. My csection butt got up and walked to the nurses station and asked for my son. "All the boys are kept til 11:30 for circumcisions". It was 10:30 and the surgery was to be at 11. I turned to my husband and I said in a calm manner, "Didn't we tell these ******* that I did not want our son cut? You'd think after 3 x's of saying so they would've made a note of it somewhere". You should've seen those nurses scrambling to get my son!


Tom Tobin on Mother Jones, November 17, 2010

When my oldest was born, I was getting scrubbed up to go see him. I heard a blood curdling scream. I thought someone was being murdered. It was like no sound I had ever heard, there was so much pain. I ran into the room, and could feel the hairs on my neck standing up.

It was a baby being circumcised.

The nurse told me that it was too bad I had soaped up. My boy was next to be circumcised, although we had never requested it, nor had signed any papers. I ran to him, and held him, so no one could do anything violent to him. ... 35 years later, I can still hear that kid's shriek, and it still raises the hairs.


Rebecca Lacy on Facebook April 27, 2011

I was scheduled to have an at home birth but my baby boy decided to show up a little too early and I ended up being in the hospital - but still able to do everything with out doctors/nurses there. Just myself and my mid-wife. ...

But he was so small & so early they took him back pretty fast, with me by his side of course and said "we will be right back with your son" I made them stop dead in their tracks and demanded to know WHERE they were taking my son. One nurse said "his circumcision"

I began to panic and tell them "Please bring me my son back now. I was not informed of this nor was I even asked for him to be circumcised or not and I am choosing not to."

She kind of just stood there like I was crazy or something, so I demanded for him back this time and she then came and apologized and handed him back to me. Once he got the health clear[ance] we left that place ...


SunshineConnie on Big Government June 17, 2011

My son was in the nursery 29 years ago after birth and I came in to find a strange Dr getting ready to cut. I and his father had requested NO CIRCUMCISION and there was a tag on his incubator and written orders. They just took turns doing all the babies. I caught holy hell from a whole lot of the nurses telling me how unclean and unhealthy it was as well as a communicator of disease to women.


Jennifer Phoenix on Facebook, October 12, 2014

Make your wishes very clear to your OB or midwife, have it noted in your chart. Bring paper and a marker and make a sign for your door and/or the bassinet that says NO CIRCUMCISION. When filling out preregistration paperwork, ask if there is a waiver or form for declining circumcision.

I wish I had done all this and more. I had to tell at least 6 different people that my son was not to be circumcised, including waking up to a nurse preparing to remove his bassinet from my room. I screamed at that one.

... I did not have any signs prepared. I wish I had.

Christen Crosby on Facebook, January 11, 2015
It was the medical centers of central Georgia ... it happened last August. Even though I had stated when I entered the hospital that I had no intentions of circumcising. The nurse just walked in my room like she owned the place "okay mama I'm here to take your baby, but don't worry he'll be back soon" ...  I asked what for? "His circumcision" "uhm I didn't consent to that, so you were just about to take my son without my permission" " on no ma'am! You would have had to sign forms! But why aren't you choosing to do so?" "Because I'm an intactivist that's why!" Next thing I knew the doctor was coming in questioning me. ...  I was so furious my baby stayed with me until I was so sleep exhausted that my mom had to beg me to let the nurses take him so that I could get some sleep. Best bet I double checked my son when they brought him back

Melanie Childers
The nurses hounded me to circ but not as bad as in Christen's case !
[I did manage to bring home an intact son each time, but they badgered me with my second at every shift change. - Facebook, March 4, 2015]

Silva on Claycord, May 7, 2015

... When I went into Kaiser Permanente in 1987 to deliver my boy I signed papers and specified that they were NOT to circumcisize my baby. When he was born, the doctor cut into his shoulder when giving me an episiotomy. They took him away to wait for a doctor to become available who could stich him up. After waiting and asking for him for 6 hours my husband went to find him. He found him in the nick of time, as they were taking him just then to perform a circumcision. I would’ve been SO pi$$ed off if that had happened to him. I later learned that none of our family members were curcumcized either. I have always felt good about my decision not to do that to him.

''I asked where the were taking him... NO YOU'RE NOT!''
- Twitter, July 14, 2018
asked four times and nearly taken
- Sarah on Intact America, May 4, 2021

coerce-JL ''''
- Twitter, June 18 2021
(They got him in the end:
at 25 he was talked into being cut for "phimosis",
which he bitterly regrets, because it was botched.)

New mom says her opposition to circumcision

met with backlash

by Scott Froehlich

...Sarah Zeimet gave birth to her second child ... on March 19, 2019. A perfectly healthy baby boy.

Soon after delivery, nurses started asking if she was going to go ahead with a circumcision. A resolute Zeimet said no. She said three nurses, stopping by her recovery room on separate occasions, asked, only to be met with the same response.

Finally, a fourth nurse came in to prep the infant to be circumcised, Zeimet said, before she shouted “No.”

“I was horrified that if he was taken out of the room that they were going to circumcise him,” she said.
In the weeks after the birth of her son, Zeimet said several friends and family members asked if she had had her son circumcised. After sharing the fact that she and her husband opted not to have their boy circumcised, she said she felt some backlash....

Georganne Chapin, executive director of Intact America, said what Zeimet said she went through is all-too common.

“The fact that she was pressured multiple times shows how common the practice is, how cavalier people are about it,” Chapin said.

GazetteXtra (New Jersey) July 10, 2021

(11 narrow escapes)

[My Mother's] insistence on homebirth and on 'natural childbirth' as advocated by Dr Grantly Dick Read was far from conventional for the day [1943], as was [My father]'s insistence that I not be circumcised. When, a few weeks after my birth, the visiting Plunket nurse 'stomped up the hall' and said to [him] in shocked tones, 'What are you thinking of, Dr Sutherland? That boy has not been circumcised!' Ivan (who, Nancy recalled, often joked that 'Plunket nurses collected foreskins like philatelists collected stamps') replied gravely to the nurse (whose eyes widened before she walked out and never returned): 'You know, Miss Bowron, from time immemorial human beings have mutilated the things of which they were afraid.'
- Oliver Sutherland, Paikea: the life of I L G SUtherland


First-person accounts by parents pressured to circumcise their sons


I was appalled when the nurses at the hospital kept him to get a circumcision after he got shots. I had to ask 4 times for my son back, and finally got up out of the bed (after a csection) and went to the nurses station demanding my son back. "We keep all the boys til noon for their circumcisions" the nurse said. I cursed at them and was furious. I had told them 3 times I did not want my son cut.

- casey martin, change.org, December 5, 2008


Trying to leave the hospital with our newborn son was like trying to escape from circumcision mountain.

- Jenny O'L, The Economist, June 23, 2008


My son was born June 1979 at Madison General Hospital, Wisconsin. It was clear to me that any kind of genital cutting of newborns is not only unnecessary, but a heinous invasion of personal physical integrity amounting in my mind to assault. This was clear to my wife and to our pediatrician as well. Naively I thought everything was taken care of and my healthy new son was perfectly safe. I hardly realized the critical danger he was running as regards his genital integrity so long as he and his mother were still in hospital.

You can imagine, perhaps, the shock and fear I felt when a rather agitated nurse accosted me in the hallway on the second day and urgently pressed on me the information that C--- hadn't been "circ'ed yet":

"Do you know that the baby hasn't been circ'ed yet? What are you going to do about this? You need to get those papers signed!"

Perhaps not panic, but there was a definite tone of emergency and high urgency in this woman's voice and physical manner. Implied was the accusation, why, as father, hadn't I acted before this. Really alarmed, I exclaimed:

"That's right. He's not supposed to be circumcised. This is not supposed to happen."

"Are you sure?" she asked, "Once he's left the hospital it can't be done so easily," she went on to explain.

"But he's not supposed to be circumcised; there is no medical reason for this," says I.

"But it's usual," she says. "We don't want it," I insist.

My discomfort and embarassment in this encounter was only heightened by the fear that this woman would disturb my wife and create fears in her, fears that I would somehow have to counter. This never transpired.

My ordeal and anxiety were, however, not over yet: on two other similar occasions I was confronted by different nurses with virtually the same reproach:

"Do you realize your son hasn't been circ'ed yet and time is running out before you leave."

I was just astounded at the realization of how mindless this force of hospital procedure actually was. No question about why we do this. It's just there to be done. No questions are to be asked. And there is a definite communication of "what's wrong with you?" "why aren't you going along with what must be called for since everybody does it?"

Truly I have never gotten over the shock of this experience.

My son's godfather told me last year that his younger brother is intact and that when he confronted his father about it, why he'd been genitally cut and his brother hadn't been, his father apologized and told him that neither he nor his wife had wanted or expected this to happen - being Greek they have no such custom and find it abhorrent - but that to his horror too late he found that the hospital personnel (in either Racine or Milwaukee, Wisconsin) had simply gone through with the "procedure" without informing them. Of course this was a prosecutable offense of unwarranted and unauthorized surgery, but it was also more than fifty years ago and my friend's parents were uninformed immigrants.

I hope these and many many other stories serve as so many nails into the coffin of enforced and involuntary genital mutilation of all kind, but especially in the case of the newborm.


Greg B at motheringdotcommune
May 22, 2008

My D[arling] W[ife]'s OB/GYN asked about it several times at pre birth office visits, and we said no. Seemed like it was all resolved.

Then, at the actual birth, just after I had cut the umbilical cord, he began pressuring us big time. My wife was so out of it, she does not even remember, and if I had not been there, probably would have succumed to his pressure. He walked back and forth, tone of voice, posture, practically pleading with me to change my mind. I believe many people would have changed their mind under his assault.

Very unprofessional.


leighti123, at motheringdotcommune, May 23, 2008

At the hospital, at least 5 people asked if I wanted d[arling ]s[on] circ'd - I said no each time but they kept asking. They were pretty awful there about that - every time I said 'no' they would roll their eyes and say 'are you sure?' - (Yes, I'm sure that I don't want to let anyone cut pieces off my perfect baby....)


layla983 at motheringdotcommune, May 23, 2008

As soon as I found out it was a boy, they handed us a bill. Had to be pre-paid. I called & said we didn't want it done, so not to bill us like the paperwork said we'd be billed. The lady on the phone told me to "think it over" & I got the bills. Again, I called & told them not to send them. About 2 weeks later I get ANOTHER letter saying that if I didn't pay my late payment & current payment, they'd want everything paid in advance before seeing me for anything, even my regular OB visits. After a day on the phone & calling several people in that building, I got it taken care of.

A doctor also mentioned it to us, even though it was marked in our chart that it wasn't getting done. When we told the midwife to correct our chart (we were asked when they confirmed my pregnancy, I said we weren't sure because I was still talking to DH about it, but they went ahead & marked circ anyway), she obviously cringed. She also rolled her eyes when she realized I had changed DH's mind (DH said something to that effect, I forget what though) & if she wasn't in a hurry I think she would have given me a lecture about how the dad should choose since he has a penis & I don't.

And my personal favorite circ comment EVER? Right after DS was born, after 24 hours of labor, 3 hours of pushing & about 3 minutes away from an emergency c-section if he hadn't come when he did, I hadn't even got to hold DS yet, the doctor is stiching me up, & he asked "So...you want him circ'ed?" I told him no, then he said he remembered that was in my chart. He then said, "I figured if I had to stay here all night for you, I'd go ahead & do it myself instead of letting the weekend on call OB do it so I could get paid for it." That left me pretty speechless.


purplestraws at motheringdotcommune, May 23, 2008

We weren't pressured to circ our son, but ... I seriously think that we were asked 10 times, even after they had put it on his chart that he was not to be circ'd. It was really pretty ridiculous...


Thixle at motheringdotcommune, May 24, 2008

I gave birth to a DAUGHTER in the only hospital for 25 miles... and they still gave me a Circumcision Release Form in with all the standard birth certificate/picture order form package. No one said anything about it while I was pregnant.


Johnathan Dorley at motheringdotcommune, May 25, 2008

I was pressured to [be] circumcise[d] about a year ago when I was about 18, in the UK. I had some small problem with my penis (some veins appeared swollen), which I went to my doctor for, and he decided to refer me to a urologist.

The urologist examined my penis, found no problem with my veins, but decided that I should be circumcised because my foreskin was tight. I immediately refused, and I tried to explain that it wasn't as tight as it had been a year before, because I had been stretching it. He told me that my stretching loosened the foreskin by giving it small tears [this is not true if the stretching is gentle enough], and that it would soon become even tighter. He also told me that I would get a build up of smegma, which he said could cause cancer.

I refused the operation, and he offered a 'half-circumcision', and I still refused, and he seemed to get a little annoyed. He told me "well, think about it, and if you wait you may later get paraphimosis, and then we'll be operating on an emergency basis".

A year later, and of course my penis is fine. Unfortunately at the time I was a little upset by the whole thing, and I didn't realise that I could actually complain about it, so I didn't file any complaints.


cherri0196 at motheringdotcommune, May 25, 2008

I definitely got pressured by my delivering OB to circumcise, unsuccessfully of course!! The birth and everything went great, my son was born healthy with no problems and im Thankful for that!! Then things went south when he say's to me " o.k. he looks GREAT! we can get him circumcised tomorrow" ( This is literally RIGHT after the birth, i mean he just stitched me up and im still laying there bleeding when he says this to me, nice huh?) I say to him...."oh No we're NOT getting him circumcised!!" Then of course he starts spewing this non-sense about how it's cleaner and healthier and its better to just get it done now....blah blah blah (meanwhile my pro-circ family is in the room eating up every word he say's) and i just told him that we're not changing our minds, and that issue was resolved. After that i really didn't have any other problems, My Lactation Consultant asked me if i was getting him circumcised mainly out of curiosity and I told her "No" and she just said "GOOD!". My son's pediatrician looked him over the next day but didn't say anything regarding circumcision.

The day i was getting discharged one of the recovery nurse's walk in and say's "Oh did you want to get him circumcised??" (This was like an hour before they let me go so it was kind of like they forgot about me, which was nice!) I just said "Nope" and she just turned around and walked out. THEN the Delivering OB (AGAIN) came in just to check on me and see how I was doing, said I looked good and was discharging me and before he walked out he say's "If you change your mind about getting him circumcised, let me know, I can do it"

Thanks for the support butt head!!!


SunkenShip on Japan ForumAugust 17, 2010

When my son was born, we were asked about 20 times if we wanted him circumcised, despite the fact that our birth plan stated "NO CIRCUMCISION." Every nurse and doctor kept asking, "He's not circumcised. You don't want him circumcised?"

And then pediatricians feel the need to advise me that my son is "more at risk".


bjett posting in Sueeasy 12 February, 2009

When I gave birth to my son in 1995 at Presbyterian Hospital in Charlotte NC. I informed the pediatrician (the person that does the circumcision) in advance that I did not want my son circumcised. He agreed that there was no medical reason, but still recommended it so he would look like other boys. The day after my son was born (he was born at night) a nurse came in to my hospital room with a number of forms to sign, including a circumcision consent form. I told them that I did not want my son circumcised unless they could give me a valid medical reason for it. The nurse left. A couple of hours later two nurses came back in with only the circumcision consent form and asked me to sign it. I asked them why they were giving me the form again when I had declined earlier. They said, "We just want to make absolutely sure you do not want this." I asked if there was a good medical reason to do so (I knew there wasn't, I just wanted to see what they would say). Suddenly one of the nurses grabbed the form and started to scratch a big red "X" over it. She seemed upset so I asked if she was mad. She replied, "Well, I am just making sure he isn't accidentally circumcised."

Good grief. I was shocked how medicine was being practiced at one of the largest hospitals in Charlotte NC, nurses repeatedly soliciting for unnecessary medical procedures and then suggesting that there's a significant likelihood that the procedure may still be performed without my consent if I do not make it very clear that I do not want the procedure for my son by having a large X crossed over the consent form.

I have no suit but can testify for a plaintiff if anyone has a claim against this hospital for a circumcision performed during this time period...


...and so he bankrolled Intact America

Intact America, June 22, 2009

Dean Pisani says he and his wife were pressured to have their expected baby circumcised by the obstetrician and doctors in Illinois hospitals even before they knew his sex.

The Pisanis researched the topic "and could find no rational or persuasive argument to subject a baby to surgery that had no medical benefit. We came under pressure from doctors prior to the birth of both of our children, but none could substantiate the medical necessity to perform the surgery. The pressure from doctors was both inappropriate and indefensible."


christine mastin of PA posting on US News.com, September 4, 2009

i was a single mother when my son was born. The nurse came in with instruction for circumcision, i said i didn't sign anything to have him circumcised, she said we'll do that next, i said no we wont he is staying complete, unharmed, not damaged, left in tact. She came back three more times trying to get me to sign the paper work, i demanded to see my son in tact. she scowled at me in disgust.


ajax57 on New York MagazineOcteber 20, 2009

Isn't it nice that Hugo had a choice? Look across the pond: most men neither need nor want to have part of their penis cut off. When my son was born, our doctor and nurse really pressured us to do it, without any of the "informed consent" mumbo-jumbo. They just wanted to do it. We didn't, even though I'm cut. There's no medical study supporting the belief that an un-circumcised America would suffer - or that Europeans are less healthy - and obviously amputating sexual tissue must diminish sexual sensation, no matter what circumcised "doctors" say. This was all before the HIV/circumcision scare, but I see that HIV rates in uncircumcised Europe are lower than in mostly circumcised America. Duh: if you are having sex with infected people, count on getting infected, cut or not. I think the new push to circumcise is psychological, not medical.


Alison on Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross, October 24, 2009

... My son was born at 31 weeks and only 3 lbs. I told them then that I did not want him circumcised. They explained to me that most children [should] keep the same appearance as their father's. I told them that dad was circumcised but that the baby will NOT be. After spending 3 wks in the NICU they said that he was finally strong enough to be circumcised. Do they really believe that a child that has already been struggling, should then have his penis mutilated before coming home? It kind of makes me sick that they were so persistent.


Petition to the CDC Signature # 12,049:

3:11 pm PST, Nov 4, David Gates, California

We had to request multiple times and had to confirm with our doctors and nurses that we did NOT want our son circumcised. The pediatrician said "really? I guess it's not that necessary anymore. Here's how you clean it..." The resistance to our decision compared to the blase response of the pediatrician indicates an atrocious knowledge-procedure gap for newborn boys.


Ootie grl on The Frisky, November 12. 2009

I did not have my son circumcised. Its his stuff. He can decide when hes older. I felt weird making such a personal decision for him. The nurses were really pushing it though. Circumcision is not neccesary is it?


wrpd on Pharyngula, December 4, 2009

When my first son was born in 1975 I told the doctor not to circumcise him. He didn't ask us about it; he was just going to do it automatically. He gave me all the stupid reasons, like being different from his friends. I prevailed. I went through the same process with the same doctor with my second son in 1977.


Barbara Lindsey, California a petition to the AAP, December 4, 2009 (signature #753)

Doctors really try very hard to get the mother to sign consent forms for circumcision. I declined, but my doctor kept trying to get me to do it. I think this is really unnecessary.


coastalcarla on the Huffington Post, December 12, 2009

I was told by my ob/gyn 21 years ago that I would be committing what amounted to child abuse if I didn't do it to my son when he was born.


Lisa Warmbrodt, Kentucky on the Care2 petition to the CDC (#14,058), January 2, 2010

... my son was born in California, and I asked that he not be circumcised. I moved to Kentucky three years later, and my son got a kidney infection. I was told by the doctor that it was because he was uncircumcised, and not knowing any better, I allowed them to perform the procedure. They botched it, and my son was subjected to intense pain and subsequent embarrassment that he still suffers fifteen years later. Now I know it wasn't even necessary.


NoGodsNoMasters on the Experience Project, October 9, 2010

You know even though my boys penis's are completely healed, I still feel guilty for having them snipped. I wish I would have been provided with more information with my first born. Instead I was pressured by the doctors and family to circumcise.


blondeNklutzi on Baby and Bump, January 7, 2010

OH [Other Half] and I have decided NOT to have the baby circumcised when he is born, OH is not and I don't want to subject a newborn to an unecessary (sp?) surgery. My OB [Obstetrician] is being really really pushy about this though! Luckily our pediatrician is supportive.


Rood Andersson on a restoration mailing list, January 15, 2010

After the wife of a member of our foreskin restoration group (NORM-Phoenix) suddenly gave birth to a boy six weeks premature (in 2004), he, the husband, felt compelled to stand guard over the child for several weeks prior to the child's discharge from the hospital, as both parents were under constant pressure to have their child's foreskin removed.

Just before the child's release, one obviously exasperated doctor accosted the father, almost demanding that the child be circumcised, saying: "But that's what we do, here!" This in a large hospital located in a tony, northerly section of the seemingly progressive town of Scottsdale, Arizona.


jtraveler80 on Men's Health, March 1, 2009

... I have been witness to nurses telling parents that it's child abuse if they don't CIRC their son. ...


rufus firefly on The Huffington Post March 3, 2010

I am uncut and in my 38 years I have NEVER had any problems with my penis, nor have I ever felt awkward about it or been ridiculed by any of the women I have been with. In fact, most didn't even notice and a few who had never seen one told me that they liked it better the natural way. I insisted that our son also be left intact, though the hospital staff must have asked us at least half a dozen times if we wanted to circumcise him. If the AAP changes its policy to recommend circumcision, they will probably make it much harder for parents to opt out of it.


Mike on The Oracle (U of South Florida) March 16, 2010

"It’s not right for the CDC to impose suggestions" -- I have to agree, anyone that has had a son born in the US already knows the constant badgering from the medical profession. They can make money off the procedure, by the CDC making a recommendation it just gives the medical community another form of coercion to place on parents during a stressful time. My son was born back in 2005, we were ask[ed] a total of 3 times before I could get my son safely home (question[s] like "you realize your son hasn't been circumcised yet"). Why were they so interested in my son's penis? I can only think it was the money not the well being of my child.


"That dirty European"

françoise on May 20, 2010

(to my sons: sorry if this embarrasses you)
When i INSISTED that i would NOT sign the medical release decades ago, for the rest of my stay in the ward, nurses pointed me out to each other referring to me in loud whispers as that DIRTY EUROPEAN. I am an old woman now but went around the block a few times in my, too short, heydays and my position hasn’t changed as a mother or as a woman.


coyote on Sean's Girls June 6, 2010

i am an imigrant to the states from ukraine. i was born there and therefore am intact. recently i was in the hospital where my brother was being born, and the doctor came in with some papers and handed them to my father. i saw a vein bulge in his neck and looked damn near ready to yell at him. the doctor started explaining that it had "health benefits" and made it sound that every intact person WILL get some sort of disease. my dad told him that he, his family, his friends, and everyone he knows is intact and has never had disease or any problem regarding the foreskin. he also told him that he knows more cut guys who have stds than intact men. after handing the papers back without signiture, the doctor looked suprised that anyone would choose not to.


Nick on Babble.com June 16, 2010

... When our son was born this past February, we had already decided long before that he would not be circumcised. However, we were probably asked at least a dozen times if we wanted to have it done, to the point that I worried it might happen by accident, if they mixed him up with another baby. ...


Mokehillannie on CBS News November 12, 2010

Fifty years ago I Had to fight the doctor to keep my son from having that barbaric action taken on him. They told me it was cleaner and I said, then cut the tips of his fingers off to keep the nails clean!! That stopped their arguements


Cara on Mother Jones, November 17, 2010

My husband who is circumcised was adamant that his son not be mutilated like he was. He watched him like a hawk in the hospital because it seemed like everyone was ready to cut off our son's foreskin at every turn. No one in the hospital understood our decision. We also had several disagreements with family members who believed that it was medically necessary and thought that our son would have problems later in life.


ErinKate23 on 9 Davids blogspot November 22, 2010

I gave birth to my son in a small, "baby friendly" hospital with waterbirth tubs in every room. It was a beautiful space, a very unusual hospital that paid close attention to gentle beginnings, didn't have a nursery, and taught safe co-sleeping practices. Yet, despite this attention to a peaceful start, they asked me 4 times if I wanted to have David circumcised. I told them no in 4 creative ways, learning that all of the nurses and most of the doctors didn't approve of the practice. THEY STILL DID IT [to other babies]. I will never forget resting in my beautiful room with my perfect son in my arms, listening to the screams of baby boys being cut in a little room next to the nurses' station. I cried and held David close - but those screams still haunt my nightmares. I wanted to run in and stand in front of that knife. I wanted to run to their parents rooms and shout, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO YOUR PERFECT BABY? I know it probably wouldn't have done any good, but I still feel like I didn't do enough. So, I'm speaking out....


Rabbit0340 on YouTube March 8, 2011

i was pregnant when i posted on here last. my son is now 6 months old. they asked us 10 times before we left the hospital if we wanted him circumsized. i completely left it up to my husband and he told them no everytime they asked. i sent my husband all kinds of emails and information and even though we never actually spoke to each other about it my point got through and hes told me several times how happy he is we left our son intact. dad calls baby george anteater sometimes lol


Daya Chaney-Webb on Parkville-Overlea Patch, April 21, 2011

The only difference between having a girl or a boy, in the beginning, is that when you have a boy, your obstetrician will discuss scheduling a circumcision.

Usually not posed as a question (at least in my experience with two boys), this procedure has been par for the course in the U.S. since brought here from England in the late 19th century. ...

If I could do it over again, I wouldn't choose circumcisions for my boys. I felt pressured by the doctors, and worried about my husband's approval.


jeremy_mi on stloday (St Louis) June 15, 2011

We had our baby boy 7 years ago at the "baby factory" (St Johns Mercy) and they put lots of pressure on us to circ our son. They tried to make us feel we were making a big mistake by not having it done.

They actually slipped the circ order in with other forms they asked my wife to sign such that she signed the circ order without realizing it. When I told the nurse that we would not circ she said well your wife agreed to the procedure. My wife told me that she never saw the form. After that we were labled difficult patients. My son was NOT circumcised.


jciferniperry on YouTube June 24, 2011

I have a newborn son - less than 4 weeks old. We did not circumcise him as my husband and I had previously decided not to. I was asked three different times if we wanted it done and each time we declined. One of the reasons offered for it was that it is covered by insurance in our state. As if that's a reason!


Calebsgm on Huffington Post July 1, 2011

To be honest, when my son was born in 1978, he was circumcize­d. The doctor acted like this was something that was routine and really never even gave me a choice about it. Now, I know that he should have given me more informatio­n about how the procedure was done and made sure I was making an educated choice....


Kim on The Bay Citizen August 5, 2011

25 yrs ago I refused circumcision for my newborn. Even his doctor tried to humiliate me. I couldn't care less back then and now I see I was on the right side of history. Feel sorry for all the boys that can't get it back now.


Sugarcoated on MSNBC , 2011

... with my first child they didn't even really ask me if I wanted my son circumcised, its all so "assumed". They shove a consent in your face and being only 20yrs old then, thinking they have my best interests at heart right? Wrong! My son was scarred in such a way he had to be "redone" at about the age of 2. After that I decided my second son could make the choice for himself.


KenInd on Huffington Post January 30, 2012

When my mother viewed her first grandson, she noted that we had decided to leave him intact. She said that is fine; that my father had been intact and that I was probably the first in our family's line for whom circumcisi­on at birth had been chosen. I thought no more about it. It was the rule when I was a boy.

A decade later, moments before she passed away, I held her hand. She whispered something. I bent closer to hear. "I am sorry," she said. "I wanted you to know."

She was sorry that she had chosen for me something that she really did not want; something the lying[-]in hospital thought was essential. This had haunted her for years. I did not know.

To this day I regret that she felt the need to express regret as her last words to me. I wish I had never had this done for me for that reason alone, if for no other. I hope not one of my male descendent­s ever have it imposed upon them. It will be their choice, and their choice alone.


RD on February 16, 2012

I’m an American male and was really hurt to find out what my mother had consented to. I hate what was done to me because of some pushy ... doctor. My mother said no twice.


Thors Hammer (@ThorsHammerr) on Twitter February 20, 2012

Pedetrician tried a 6th time to convince my wife to do a #circumcision on my baby. Fucking predation, not informed consent. #i2


SausageM on Slate June 30, 2012

When did circumcision come back in fashion again for Christians? It's not seen as a religious thing any more, but we had to tell the hospital several times we didn't want it done, and then they charged us for the procedure they didn't perform.


not2 good on Huffington Post July 2, 2012

It has always puzzled me that parents who buy baby shampoo, to prevent hurting their baby's eyes, see no issue when it comes to cutting off the foreskin without a pain killer. When my son was born, in an military hospital in Germany, I practically had to fight the doctor to prevent him from circumcising him.


Rosa on YouTube (0:36 in) July 16, 2012

What kinda made sure for me that it was a definite "No way, nohow" was the pressures I got from the doctors. The pressure from the doctors came a couple of days after you gave birth, in that timeframe, and "Why aren't you doin' it?" "Everyone on the hospital is doin' it." It just kind of shoved me over, it was like, a procedure. No respect for humans at all. Male or female, that's irrelevant. And the other issue that came to me, while I was in hospital was, it weighed very heavy on me, why should a woman make a decision for a man that has no voice? I just, something along that line, I couldn't live with myself. So I said "No way, nohow, I am not mutilatiing my child." ...


SamaireP on YouTube, October 15, 2012

In 1993, 1995, 1997 & 1999 I gave birth to a son in each year, so I had 4 sons.

I would not allow them to be mutilated.

In one case, a doctor ranted for half an hour in my hospital room, a day after I had given birth, about how I was doing my baby a bad thing not to make sure he was 'kept clean' & I was mute with astonishment at this doctors anger at me. But I did not budge. My sons are now ages 19, 17, 15 & 12 are intact & happy & healthy.


Dean Esmay on A Voice for Men January 6, 2013

It was unreal how many times my ex and I had to say no to the hospital staff with our sons. The nurses were particularly bullying about it.


A fan on Hey LLL: Circumcision Affects Breastfeeding! Tell moms the truth! February, 2013

I had a son in November 2010. I had him circumcised. ... However, I gave birth to another boy in September 2012. Before I even knew he was a boy, I decided to leave my baby whole. He was born with a heart condition called Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome and despite that, the doctors still asked if I was having him circumcised over and over. The answer was and always will be NO! He is 3 and a half months old now, still intact and has endured 2 open heart surgeries. No one will lay a hand...or a scalpel...on my son's penis. He is perfect the way he is....


Jo Williams on Intactivists of Australia March 4, 2013

While working as a maternity nurse in the 1960?s, I knew of at least one male infant who bled to death following circumcision carried out in the hospital where he was born. I can still see his parents’ faces when they were told their beautiful baby was dead. Because of that experience I did not allow my son to be circumcised in spite of the social pressure on all parents to consent to it at the time. We were practically forced to agree and it took a strong parent to say ‘no’ to the pressure to consent ... My son is very grateful I refused to be bullied by the so called ‘medical experts’ or religious nutters, and he would never allow his sons to be circumcised.either. ... How many deaths have there actually been? Is anyone taking responsibility for them? If not, why not?


Cassandra Price on Facebook, March 23, 2013

The Hospital nurses thought my sister was crazy and kept trying to take her son to get it done even though she signed paperwork to refuse it.


Beth on the Friendly Atheist, May 1, 2013

We had our oldest circumcised and, at 3 year old, he has a skin bridge that will have to be taken care of later in his life. Welcome to the world buddy, We are cutting your penis and it is going to cause you problems later in life.

We didn't cut our second son and the doctor went a little nuts! He told me over and over again (before I left the hospital) that my son would have increased risk of UTI, that if I waited he would have to be under anesthesia. He implored my husband. We like this guy a lot, he does a great job with the kids, but hey man...I said keep your hands off my kids c*ck, I understand that there is a risk, but its not like I don't bathe the kid!


Jill Hartley Lybarger on Facebook, May 4, 2013

40+ years ago when my brother was born the hospital refused to admit my Mom until she signed the papers giving them permission to circumcise him. My Dad is not circumcised and had no intention of having it done to his children.


Nicole on Facebook June 6, 2013

My son is was born 15 minutes after arriving at the hospital. Because of his fast arrival he was admitted into the NICU and was kept there for 7 days because he "might" get jaundice, even though jaundice can easily be treated at home! FOUR times while going for feedings and visits, there were circumcision consent forms laid out for us to sign. Each time we put a BIG X across the paper and it was filed in his folder. I honestly felt like they were trying to "trick" us into signing it knowing that we had to leave him there. On the last attempt I made it very clear to the neonatologist that if he was to be circumcised, we would sue! Circumcision was never mentioned again.


Karen on Joseph4GI June 18, 2013

... When I had my oldest, we repeatedly declined circ but they were so keen on circumcising him that when I went to the bathroom, I took him with me to keep them from taking him against my will. My husband and I had to take turns staying awake and watching him because they tried to get him in the middle of the night when we were asleep. That's hardly leaving it up to parental preference.


Caitie - personal communication, July 8, 2013

... I am a retired science teacher with a Master's Degree in human physiology and PhD course completion credits in cardiology, so I know quite a bit about the human body and how it works.

My son ... was born in April of 1984. I had been in labor for 32 hours (natural childbirth), so I was starving and tired ... I hadn't eaten since Sunday and this was Tuesday morning.

We didn't know ahead of time whether we were having a boy or a girl... As I passed the baby's shoulders and he was officially born, I heard one of the nurses say in enthusiasm, “What do we have? Oh, it's a boy!” and my heart soared. I had a son. A beautiful, perfect son. I was thrilled.

My OBGYN put this beautiful newborn baby boy on my stomach and the very first thing he said, while I was still marveling at the fact that I'd just become the mother of this absolutely gorgeous child, was “Are you going to have him circumcised?” ... My son hadn't even had his umbilical cord cut yet!

I hesitated, because I don't think circumcision is necessary and I didn't want to subject my newborn son to such a procedure. However, I was overruled by both the doctor, who said, “I recommend it!” and my husband, who said, “YES!” very definitively. He is, as you can imagine, circumcised as well.

I gave in, largely because I was so tired and hungry, but I had misgivings. ... I did have the thought flash through my mind that I didn't want to subject [him] to ridicule or feeling “different” by being perhaps the only kid he knew who had a foreskin, but I still had doubts ...

The day after ... , a nurse brought him in to me to show me now to bathe him, and he was still intact. The thought crossed my mind, “I could still put a stop to this,” and I mentioned to the nurse, “I see they still haven't done the circumcision. I'm really not sold on the idea,” and she said, “I know, but it's for the best.” I looked at my perfect, intact son and thought, “I hope it doesn't hurt him too much” and it was breaking my heart. How I wish I could go back to that day again! I'd never have allowed it now, and I'd have told my husband so. I didn't care what the doctor thought, it was really because my husband wanted it so that I let it happen.

... To this day, 29 years later, I regret not fighting harder against the procedure. ... I don't buy into all of the traditional arguments for it, and if so many of the world's males are intact and have none of the problems we're told will happen to uncircumcised males, I have to question the validity of the arguments and assume that they come from a place of prejudiced brain-washing of both doctors and lay people.

... I support the movement to allow newborn boys remain the way nature intended; with an intact foreskin....


Amanda Bowden on Facebook November 8, 2013

So sad some drs do see it as common when i had my son 3 1/2 months ago they asked me every day till i left the hospital if i wanted to sign the paper work and get it done


EOD on My OB Said WHAT? November 25, 2013

... My room happened to be directly across from the nurses’ station. When it came time for us to go home, I overheard our midwife tell the nurse on duty that she was going to start the discharge paperwork.

Nurse: You can’t discharge them! They haven’t had him circumcised yet!

Our midwife informed her that we’d declined both on paper and verbally. Then the nurse proceeded to argue with the midwife that there MUST have been a misunderstanding. I guess having “no circumcision” in our birth plan, actively declining in our admissions paperwork, and reiterating “no” at every single shift change somehow did not preclude any ambiguity for her.

To be fair, all three midwives and all three pediatricians we had seen up to this point were either openly supportive of our (non)decision or never mentioned circumcision at all. It was the nurses who just would not. stop. asking. Our impression was that they believed we would “come to our senses” eventually, although I suppose some of them could have just been functioning on autopilot rather than passing judgment. Still, it was the one blight on what was an otherwise very positive experience.

The silver lining to this particular incident was that after our obviously irritated midwife stuck her head in to verify that my husband and I honestly, truly, really meant what we said, we also got to overhear her giving the nurse an earful–not just for her lack of professionalism, but for acting as though taking home a perfectly normal, healthy male baby as-is would be something to avoid at all costs.


"Make him normal"

Ashley on My OB Said WHAT? November 25, 2013

Wow. This sounds like one of the 5 nurses I had with my last. We medically could NOT circumcise our son and she followed us to the parking lot demanding we "make him normal." I hope the OP had a slightly saner nurse on her hands.


Jenni on My OB Said WHAT? November 25, 2013

sounds like when i took my son home! two whole days of nurses coming in, going “oh, and you’re not circumcising him” and then moving on became a FREAK OUT 20 minutes before we were supposed to leave as i was finishing the discharge paperwork, three nurses came in and said “You can’t leave yet, we didnt circumcise him!” and then looked at me kinda deadpan when i said “we’re not going to” and the nurse that was already there with me just showed them the paper where i had already declined it….. ...


Dee Resnick Forlano on Omaha.com December 18, 2013

Doctors continually solicit and push parents into offering up thier sons for this mutilation. My sister in law was asked 3 times per day if she wanted her son cut while she was in the hospital recovering from his birth, Each shift of nurses, every day checked to be sure she hadn't changed her mind. There is a financial motive for health care practitioners and hospitals to solicit this unnecessary surgery.


Five mothers coerced to circumcise - one a daughter, too, by mistake. Facebook, January 12, 2014

Five mothers reported on Facebook being coerced to circumcise - one a daughter, too, by mistake.
Click to enlarge


EIK on Philly.com, January 14, 2014

We were the first ones in our family to decide against infant circumcision. Our son should decide for himself when he is older.

However, we were asked about five times at the hospital whether we were sure about our decision and we did get years of comments from some family members.


''virtually forced by the doctors'' - Facebook

Facebook, January 24, 2013


''I just had a baby LEAVE ME ALONE''

Facebook, January 29, 2014


mum2two of Sheffield, UK, on The Mail Online, April 2, 2014

I had my son in the Us, and there I had to specifically opt out of having it done. The staff asked time & time again if I wanted it doing, but I declined. There it is the done thing.


Sara MacFarlane on Facebook April 22, 2014

Sigh. This happened to me too, homebirth transfer that ended with a cesarean, Rhogam, pushy nurses. No less than five people asked if I wanted him circumcised.

Emily Felix
Sara MacFarlane, your experience sounds very similar to mine. We only had one nurse repeatedly bring up circumcision. She even approached my husband when I wasn't around. I guess she thought he'd be sympathetic to her cause- but he's intact too, and shut her right down


Dr Quarters on The Bump April 30, 2014

I've noticed it's really regional too. When I had my first son we said once that we weren't circumcising and that was it. We've moved since then and when I had DS2 we were asked multiple times if we needed to schedule the circumsion. It was almost like they thought it was forgotten. That said, regional or not, I've never felt judged in either place.


katiedidthat on The Bump May 1, 2014

We didn't with either of our boys. The hospital asked a thousand times, so we assume it is the norm here, but frankly- I don't care what anyone else is doing, these are my kids. When my ODS was born the first thing my BIL asked was "so you had him cut, right?" And then went off on my DH about how he's going to be the laughing stock of the school when he gets to high school. My theory is any teenage boy who is that concerned with whether his peers are cut or intact during gym class has some personal issues of his own to work out.


Go Bronson on Moms Gone Bronson, May 16, 2014

I was adamant that I would not be having my son circumcised but when he was born he ended up in the NICU for a week, during which time, I was asked 6 or so times whether I was having a circumcision and had I forgotten to sign the paper to get it done - as though I might have forgotten something like that!?

I couldn't possibly have decided to keep my child "in tact", could I? - I couldn't believe it! I knew that circumcision in America was almost just the done thing but I didn't realize how abnormal SOME places seem to see the process of just leaving it alone!!


Marissa, friend of Brother K on Facebook May 29, 2014

When I had my son they wrote on the board a list of things to do before discharge, every time a new nurse came in they would say "Oh we still need to perform the circumcision." I told each nurse over and over it was NOT to be done. Finally after 5 nurses I spoke up and said, "Can you please write NO next to circumcision. I'm sick of getting asked, my son will not be circumcised." After that I was thanked by my dr for being an educated and informed momma :)


Even death gives no respite:

''In the midst of our grief the hospital STILL asked us multiple times if we wanted to have our beautiful full term stillborn son circumcised''


Brian Herrity on YouTube at Kaiser Permanante Hospital, Walnut Creek CA, July 6, 2014 (starts at 0:49)

"When I was boothing at a Bay Area Intactivist event once, a man told me that his son was born at this hospital, Kaiser Walnut Creek, and he had to tell five different nurses "No, I don't want to circumcise my son." When they sent the sixth nurse in - different person - again, trying to shove the consent-form down his throat, he said "No - if you send someone else in here, I will call my lawyer." And so he was just like "No, they pushed on me and felt I was lucky I made it out with my son in one piece."


Annie on the New York Times December 3, 2014

I worked as an OB nurse for many years before having a son. During those years, I watched and assisted at many, many circumcisions of newborn boys. The longer I worked, the more I came to respect our amazing bodies--bodies that make babies, grow babies and birth babies. The birth of a newborn is a true miracle--both in function and in appearance. If these beautiful newborn boys are born with a foreskin, there's probably a good reason why they have one, and who am I to decide it is unnecessary or looks funny? Now, In 1990 it was not common at all for parents to leave their newborn sons intact, and my decision was questioned by everyone except my husband, and my mother in law, who, being 1st generation Italian in the 1950's, chose not to have her sons circumcised either. I was asked 6 times during my 2 day stay in the hospital after my birth if I planned on circumcising my son and every time I emphatically said no, I am leaving him intact, I was met with shocked and pitying looks--these from health professionals! My intact son is 25 and my intact husband is 59. Zero issues with either one.


ByronMaximus on CommonHealth December 7, 2014

Horrifying, barbaric practice. my son was born at a catholic hospital - they came in wanting to do this, even gave us brochures encouraging it. I had to register an emphatic no every time I was asked.


A friend of Brother K on Facebook December 11, 2014

CDC GAMBIT ENRAGES MOM ... "My sons were born at Missouri Baptist Hospital, where they pushed circ heavily with my 2nd son in 2004. My first was born in 2001, and I was critical - I don't recall them pushing it with him. Both times I had asked them to put no circ on the chart. I am still mad, 10 years later, at how they pushed it on me with my 2nd, mostly because I know they have probably bullied other mothers into it. What they did was with my 2nd - at every nurse change asked, "When are we circumcising," after 2 obs had told me they had - at my request - put no circ on the chart. One nurse tried to give me a brochure on the circed penis. They all came in, assuming it was being done. Finally at the last change, I said, "It seems like you're pushing it!" The nurse said, 'Oh no, we're neutral," quickly changed the subject, and left. If I had it to do again, I would have raised the roof. I'd have the stickers and the onesies. I knew to fight off the wolves. Intact should be the default. It shouldn't have to be researched and fought for and debated. It should just BE. And it's not. I hate that society lied to me, and that everyone I ever dated (and the one I married) was harmed by this. The CDC thing has just angered and upset me all over again." ~A friend

sano2hate on SFGate, December 2014

...My son is now 23 and 23 years [ago] I had to make the choice of whether or not to mutilate my child. I chose not to. But the nurses in the hospital tried on a daily basis to take him away for the procedure (I had a c-section and was in the hospital for a few days). Thank goodness I was breast feeding and insisted he remain in my room 24/7; otherwise he may have been surgically damaged because the medical field treats it as routine and normal....

Johnny Bomers on the Huffington Post, March 2015

... When I was stationed in Germany with the US Airforce and my son was born I litterally had to fight the doctors on the base not to circumzise my son. Their argument came down to "Everyone in America" does it. Don't do it. There is no medical justification for it.

coerce-basicmum 'asked...5 times'
- on the Mommish page

TJ Whittaker · Middletown, Connecticut on VICE, April 1, 2015

In 2005 we had our first child. Upon arrival, I informed the hospital staff that we were not circumcising our son twice. First while filing out the paperwork and then again once we were in our room. It wasn't until the second time that I actually saw a provider write the words "No circ" on my wifes charts. My son was born and all was well aside from a small white cyst on the tip of his foreskin. The Dr said it was no big deal and that would be taken care of soon enough to which I said, "No, he's not being circumcised." His response was still positive and said it'll clear up on its own. No less than an hour later a nurse walks into our room, removes our sons diaper, and begins applying a numbing cream on his genitals. I asked her what she thought she was doing and she very matter of factly informed me that she was preparing him to be cut. I responded as nicely as possible that she needed to look at his medical records because he was not touched again like that. She checked his charts and walked out. It took me a little while to calm down and when I left to get something for my wife I made it a point to stop by the nurse manager (in front of multiple Dr and patients) and ask for reassurance that they weren't going to make another attempt at my sons penis while I was out of the hospital. The awkwardness of that question was awesome. Needless to say, my son is 9 now and still intact. No further attempts on my sons foreskin was made...

Five mothers in three hours...

coercition - five mothers' stories within three hours on Facebook
- on Brother K's Facebook page, April 21, 2015


When I was in the hospital they asked us more times than I can count (I stopped counting at 7) if we wanted our son circumcised. [My husband] became very protective and at one point said something about "I'll body slam anyone that touches my son's penis". He became so protective when he realized they wanted to harm his son.

Lace Tulloch on Facebook, May 16, 2015

When my son was born 28 years ago, i chose not to have him circumsized, i was asked more than 4-6 times while i was in the hospital if i had changed my mind! This at the time was considered controversial, to me it was a no brainer! I figured when he became an adult if he wanted to be cut, it would be his choice not mine 
Jane Smith on Collective Evolution, July 26, 2015
Four mothers in less than two hours -
4 women coerced to cut their sons
 - on Brother K's Facebook page, Novermber 5, 2015

Delinda: ''the doctor told me I wanted it done''

- commenting on Dr Kenneth Zatz' excellent Facebook comment, November 7, 2015

Dr Ann West
Dr Ann West
My son was born several years ago. In his first 24 hrs, I was asked multiple times to sign the paperwork to have him cut. At the time my husband wanted it done but I kept putting it off. I was asked so many times that the next morning I asked for my son and I to be discharged. They didn't discharge us until 6pm after multiple attempts to get me to sign the paperwork. It was nuts. Shortly before discharge Dr. West offered her circ services until 3wks of age. That's the only thing she said and then discharged us. Finally after many arguments, my husband did his research and protected his son and me from any negative comments.

Asked four times to cut their - daughter!

coerce-rya-asked 4 times to cut a daughter

Facebook, May 31, 2016


I'm from Alabama. When I had my son in December, the ob doctor on call came in my room and asked me who we wanted to do the circumcision. I told him we are not going to circumcise him, and the doctor thought [pretended] I was joking. He said, "Well I've never heard of that, everyone does that." He had a pushy attitude like I was crazy. I told him, "Well, we're not." He kept trying to talk me into it.

I was in shock he made it out like no one ever says no! I had a hard time when I was pregnant, friends and family telling me if I didn't circumcise it's gonna be nasty and hard to keep clean and he will get infections. My husband is intact so I knew that wasn't true! And I can now say intact baby boys are way easier to keep clean. It's so naturally beautiful the way God made our bodies!" ~Chelsea

- posted on Facebook by Brother K, July 2, 2016


- posted on Baby Center's Facebook page, July 5, 2016

coerce-"5 times a day, and again at every followup"

-on Daniel Tati's Facebook page, August 20, 2016

coerce - "all the nurses did was bother me on when..."
- Facebook, September 30, 2016

coerce-emily-asked 3x in the NICU
- on the Whole Network's Facebook page, October 7, 2016

23 mothers coerced to cut, part 1


23 mothers coerced to cut - Part 2

23 mothers commenting on Your Whole Baby's Facebook page within a few hours on December 2, 2016

... My husband thought I was insane, too soft even. He finally watched a video and heard me out and he finally agreed we can leave him intact.

Then, family members began harassing me. "I'll never watch him, hold him, change his diaper, he'll be called dog dick, he will never have friends, he will be made fun of, bullied, no girl will love him ect" you know the list. It especially hurts coming from your parents though.

Well fast forward to my son's delivery (5 weeks early) and thankfully I knew to be stern and hold my ground at the hospital. The first thing I said after he was born was "Don't retract him!!!!" Over the next few days I was asked by over 10 nurses -- 8 which were not ever my nurses -- to circumcise my son, and constantly asking why I wasn't circumcising ect.

Intactivists had made it clear nurses would ask, but I never knew they would be so relentless at such a vulnerable time whenever I was alone. It was discouraging and later I found out my mom was behind it. She told the nurses I was delusional and didn't understand the benefits and to continue pressuring me-- as she obviously knows best. (I learned it was her about 5 months later through an apology).

It's been an overwhelming and scary road standing up to and even being isolated from friends and family members from my decision, but I will never compromise my son's body to fit a mold in society. If that means I stand alone in my community, I stand alone. I'm trying now to work on my voice for other boys. For now, I'm happy knowing I did and am doing everything to keep my son safe and to slowly change family members points of views....

- Whitney Wilson of Illinois on Brother K's Facebook Page, December 23, 2016


coerce - '' I had to verbally reject it twice''

- on Brian Herrity's Facebook page, December 30, 2016

coerce-uncut-lady-bits ''every nurse asked me twice''

coerce-suzanne ''nurses thought I was some extremist, new age loon''

coerce-dontbdumb ''asked 7 times ... many pushed by other hospitals''
- comment on "Dr Paul C. Bennett of Dunedin, New Zealand, 'Known Genital Mutilator' "
in A Voice for Men, May 26, 2017
coerce-rose ''xx''
- Twitter, March 4, 2018
Two babies, 6 proffers each!
coerce-opticon9-2 babies, 6 nags each & passive-aggression about ''hovering''
- Twitter, June 2, 2018 (counted as 2)

coerce-qryzti ''My doctor was really pushy...''
- Twitter, July 27, 2018, responding to a trailer for American Circumcision
coerc-patty ''it was a horrible battle to not have it done''
- The Men's Rights Initiative on Facebook, September 1, 2018
coercion - 7 parents reply to American Circumcision's question
coerce-celeste via bro K "twice...badgering" (recent)
- Twitter (NB, recent)
coerce-lin ''...how hard they tried to trick me into signing the paperwork''
- Twitter, 2019
coerce Janet Benz ''the nurses forced the issue''
- - a comment on Styxhexenhammer666's video, September 10, 2019
coerce-blotch ''they came in to ask every few hours''
- Twitter, Septermber 21, 2019
coerce-steve t ''three times''
- Twitter, October 27. 2019
coerce - ''six fricking times'' and paediatrician looked for an excuse

coerce-babymomma ''they asked ... FOUR separate times''
coerce-sofi ''We're taking him to get circed ...definitely not''
- Twitter, May 5, 2020
coerce- lily 3x+husband, pamela, in icu
- Twitter, May 23, 2020
coerce-Jen asked 7 times
Twitter, June 1, 2021

coerce - had to ... fight to stop the Drs

coerce-real life mama "they asked and asked and asked''

(158 put under pressure)

A scientific survey's shocking findings:

Intact America worked with Qualtrics to send the circumcision solicitation survey to a national, random sample of 2,519 mothers who had given birth to a boy in the past four years. The survey defined “solicitation” as every time a physician, midwife, or nurse either verbally asked the mother if she wanted to circumcise her son; recommended she circumcise her son; told her that circumcision was required; handed her a circumcision consent form; or assumed (as perceived by the mother) that she wanted to circumcise her son.
Survey results (with a 3% margin of error) revealed numerous noteworthy facts:
  • 94% of mothers were solicited to have their baby boys circumcised.
  • 78% of mothers who were solicited agreed to have their sons circumcised.
  • 45% of mothers who had not been solicited allowed their sons to be circumcised.
  • “Soft sells,” such as being handed a consent form, increased circumcisions by 137%.
  • The average number of solicitations was 8.
  • Solicitation, in all forms, increased circumcisions by 173%.
  • 71% of mothers said they would have asked about circumcision without prompting.
  • 18% of mothers said they would not have thought to ask about circumcision.
  • 21% of mothers who agreed to having their sons circumcised said that they wish they had done more research.
  • 10% of mothers regretted their choice.
  • Physicians were responsible for 3 out of 5 solicitations; nurses and midwives were responsible for the remainder.

    Intact America, November 16,2020



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