Back to the Feedback pages' contents
|
I'm a passionate advocate of early circumcision [This feedback is unusual because he simultaneously posted his email on his blog, with a bit extra, as follows. He's also posted a slightly different version here.] One of the theories I have always held dear is the notion that there’s an industry dedicated to making money out of creating problems out of thin air and then offering solutions to them. [The circumcision industry is a classic example.] For instance, in this country [India], the usual dark skin is suddenly a horrible, career-threatening problem. But rub in Fair and Lovely ointment, and you know what? Any job you want can be yours! A mite less transparent is something I came across recently on the net, which informed me that, as a circumcised male, I was sexually crippled and was missing out on virtually all the delights coitus had to offer. [Actually, it says no such thing.] Not too surprisingly, most of these sites also provided nice helpful links to nice helpful surgeons willing and ready to reconstruct my foreskin for me and return me to sexual non-dysfunctionality. [Even this site, by a cosmetic surgeon, offers links to non-surgical restoration first.] I kind of passed by with a mutter and a shake of the head until I came across this site here, [You're in it.] and especially this page from the site, which somehow or other tipped me over the edge from mere irritation to full-fledged anger with its blatant conflation of circumcision and female genital mutilation ... [Actually, what these pages conflate is the genital integrity of males and females. Leaving a girl baby's genitals alone is exactly the same as leaving a boy baby's genitals alone.] ... and its open and obvious bias. [- which is spelt out on the masthead] Since the latter page provided a link for people to tell the site’s owner how clever he is [If that was its purpose, it's failed miserably], I wrote the following true account from my youth and sent it to him. I hope he suffers from a swollen glans. Hugh: I’ve been reading, with some interest, your web page, on reasons not to circumcise. Let me tell you a little story. I am an Indian. Among Indians, circumcision is (barring Muslims) exceedingly rare. As I’m not a Muslim, I wasn’t circumcised in childhood. Nor was I given any kind of instructions on genital health or hygiene. [And that is the first and most important issue.] Now, being a normal teenager, I began to have erotic dreams, and, of course, I’d have erections. One morning (I was 16 at the time) I woke to find that my foreskin had retracted behind my glans, the entire glans was swollen to twice its size, and if you haven’t experienced this, my friend, you don’t know what you’re talking about when you blab on about penile pain, may I assure you. I was, naturally, mortified. I could not discuss this with my parents because they had never even spoken of sex to me, or of genital health, or anything. [Exactly. This is the real problem.] Besides, I was terrified of what had happened, and I was – being young and stupid – hoping it would go away by itself. Well, it didn’t. I walked three kilometres to school and back, and spent the day in agony so excruciating every anti-circumcision writer should be forced to go through it for at least a year, if not eternity. On the second day I summoned up the nerve to tell my dad. He did nothing much except phone his brother, a doctor, who lived several hundred kilometres away. This brother prescribed some medicines and that’s all he did. [Again, that was negligent on his part.] By the third day I was no longer capable of walking properly, and my dad finally took me to a doctor. This guy pulled the foreskin back without the benefit of anaesthetic (later I discovered anaesthetic is compulsory for this procedure). [No, actually it isn't, but he certainly should have used a lubricant, and more gentle pressure.] Can you imagine what I went through while he was pulling back the foreskin? No? Or would you rather not think about it? I had phimosis [He now had paraphimosis, a different condition.] – which nobody told me at the time. Nobody, including this doctor, thought fit to inform me that it was a medical condition. [The Intactivist movement is entirely in favour of free and frank discussion of these matters.] The swelling, of course, went down swiftly once the pressure on the glans had been removed, but it left me with a phobia of it happening again. And of course it would happen, whenever I slept and had erotic dreams, which of course was something outside my control. On several occasions I woke in a panic, fumbling between my legs to pull back the foreskin before it got stuck behind the glans. [Again, this was poor aftercare. Measures should have been taken - non-surgical are usually sufficient - to ensure it would not happen again.] Over time, then, this thing led to the following problems: 1. I became phobic of falling asleep. I never slept well, and would start awake multiple times a night, afraid of what might be happening. This became a health problem. Ask anyone who’s suffered from chronic insomnia. 2. I became, literally, terrified of having an erection. Remember that I was at an age when the hormones have just begun surging, and you get the full picture. More than once I had to break off proceedings with girls at a crucial juncture because I could literally feel my foreskin shifting as I erected, and I had to rush off to the bathroom to try and pull it back – a procedure that was always extremely difficult and often painful. This, of course, did for my chances with the lady of the moment each time. Do you think this is funny? [Of course not.] Can you imagine what it did to my sexual self-confidence to be functionally impotent in my late teens and early twenties? Most doctors I consulted were indifferent, since according to them (just as according to you) [Wrong] it wasn’t a problem. I only wish they’d experience what I went through, and then I’d have wanted to hear what they said. Finally, when I’d saved up money for the surgery, I got myself circumcised at the age of 29. I wonder if you know what it feels like to be circumcised at that age? I wonder if you can comprehend the agony of glans rubbing on clothing until the nerve endings grow accustomed to the sensation? How do you like the idea of walking around the house, doing chores, and looking back to see a line of drops of blood behind you on the floor, huh? How about the itching as the wound dried, itching more like a blazing fire while you were trying to work? I went through hell for a month, and purgatory for almost a year afterwards, my friend, before the last of the irritation went away. [Clearly he was again given poor after-care. This should not be allowed to happen.] It was worth it, though. My word, it was. I can sleep now, and have sex (it’s a different matter that I have no sex drive left, and that might be in part because of what I’d gone through during my formative years). I don’t have any kids nor will I ever have any kids; but I’m a passionate advocate of early circumcision [That is unfortunate. His problem was very rare, and many early circumcisions would be wasted on boys and men who were never going to have it, while many would cause other problems of their own.], and I believe that people like you who militate against it either don’t know what you’re talking about, or have an ulterior motive [We do know what we are talking about and our ulterior motive is to grant to all boys and the men they become the freedom to choose for themselves what part of their own genitals they want to keep.] (those of you who advocate surgery to recreate the foreskin certainly do have an ulterior motive, one clear to understand). [Very few people advocate surgical foreskin restoration.] All the best of luck in spreading your message. I shall do my utmost to spread the truth, instead. Regards, Bill. - Bill in India |
|
The truth is that Bill is the victim of a long history of
ignorance. In the first place, if his parents and doctors had been more
willing to talk frankly about sexual issues, this could have been headed
off early.
He probably would have learnt to masturbate before he had any erotic
dreams.
Then he was given poor medical treatment, no advice, and poor aftercare.
This French doctor argues, based on 300 cases, that a major cause of
phimosis in adolescents is if they do not retract their foreskins when
masturbating. He prescribes the appropriate change in technique, which
generally results in success within three weeks.
Beaugé M.
The Causes of Adolescent Phimosis
British Journal of Sexual Medicine, September/October 1997
He offers some self-stretching exercises - which also give pleasure.
Beaugé M. Conservative Treatment of Primary Phimosis in Adolescents
[Traitment Médical du Phimosis Congénital de L'Adolescent] Saint-Antoine
University, Paris VI, 1990-1991
"We can be happy that manipulation of the tissues allows the avoidance of
surgical intervention, and in other circumstances the limitation of the
problems when surgery has unfortunately occurred."
Intactness was a necessary, but not
sufficient, cause of his problems, and is the normal state for men.
Obviously any problem in any organ can be prevented by cutting it off, but
that by itself never justifies doing it. |
|
Not "matching" never posed any problems I'm an intact guy who is in his mid-20s who was fortunate to have a mother who knew how bad circumcision really is. This is what she said when we had a discussion about circumcision: Thanks to that I wasn't circumcised (but my father was, and not "matching" never posed any problems). I was never in a situation where I was naked in front of others, so I can't mention anything about that experience (but if I was I don't think it would be anywhere as bad as the teasing that many pro-circumcision people claim it to be). P.S. Something else I want to mention: Most people on most parts of the body don't find scars attractive, but for some reason penises are an exception for some Americans (claiming that the scar tissue from a circumcision looks better than a natural foreskin and penis); I just thought that I'd mention this bit of hypocrisy. - Kelly near Oklahoma City
|
To earlier feedback.
Your feedback. Please indicate if your message is intended for posting here. If so, please include at least your city/region, state/province, country and whether you want people to be able to email you.
Related pages:
Back to the Feedback pages' contents.
Back to the Intactivism index page.